Solitary Confinement

I've spent the last three days in what I have called solitary confinement to the couch.  While I am not alone in the true sense - I have the wonderful love of my life with me and my little dog too - I am making myself stay on the couch with this blasted foot jacked up on a stack of pillows, again.  I started back to work on June 1st with a run of three half days.  I figured that would be enough to gear me up for a week of full days.  Was I ever wrong!  I made it to Thursday, never being able to complete a full day, and had to call in sick to work on Friday.  It was truly another low point for me in this recovery.  I have only called in to work sick one other time, and I wasn't able to open my eyes due to a headache caused by chemicals in the workplace.
I can't really keep my foot elevated the way it needs to be at work.  I tried balancing it on my tower for a few days, but knocked that over on my good big toe and decided that was a bit too dangerous both for myself and office IT equipment.  So, we tried a box with two pillows on it.  This helped some, but I still can't find a comfortable position.  The only time that I am truly comfortable is when I have my foot jacked up on my desk.  This is a very uncomfortable position to actually try to work in, and it's not very professional.  I limit this to a few minutes every couple of hours, mostly when I know most people are out of the office and not walking around.  
So, I promised myself if I stayed home I would keep my foot elevated the majority of the time, and so far I have kept my promise.  Not that there is much else for me to do.  I can't go shopping (not that I would, because I really dislike shopping) or to the beach or out to dinner or really anything else.  
I'm going nutty as well.  I've had a few crying jags over the last couple of weeks.  These seem to strike out of the blue, last from a few minutes to a half hour.  I know that this is normal, but hate to break down in front of co-workers.  At home is one thing, alone is best, but at work is just not cool at all.  Then yesterday I had the total opposite.  I laughed uncontrollably; side splitting, hard to breathe, tears streaming down my face, bladder bursting laughing.  I tried to share what I was laughing about with the love of my life, and he just did not find it even chuckle worthy, so I laughed harder.
Between the laughing and the crying - today I am feeling more on the weepy side, I have come to the conclusion that solitary confinement is not for me.  Tomorrow is Monday, and I am heading back to work.  I think I am feeling strong enough after this little break to work the full days.  I think that I was both physically and emotionally unprepared and not ready for full day work when I thought that I was.  This is not the first time I have underestimated healing since this journey started back on May 5th.  
The best part about tomorrow is that I can finally say that I am getting out of The Pink Monstrosity next week!  This is enough to make a girl practically giddy, though I am keeping the emotions in check and not letting them show too much.  I may very well be going back into another fiberglass prison.  I'm really, really hoping for the big, black, ugly boot though.  Really!  


Tomorrow starts the official countdown to June 23rd!

The Ultimate Sacrifice

Remember, this weekend is not about the pool being too cold, the traffic being too congested, the burgers being burned or the beer not cold enough.

It's about giving thanks for those who have served for us.  It's about taking a moment out of the game of horseshoes, turn down the Jimmy Buffett, and remember. 

I am proud that I had the opportunity to serve my country.  I am proud to know so many people who still are serving my country, who have sacrificed so much, and that so many more will continue to do so.  Go ahead, dust off those flags, put on the red, white, and blue, and remember that because of so many you have the freedom to do so.